roots

we are having the kind of spring madison should be having, and madison is having summer.

today would have been one of those days in madison to remind you that it is only march 15th and early spring in wisconsin still has one foot firmly rooted in winter (except this year).

cold, overcast, windy.

a good day to build tall towers...

color...

and learn new tricks...

aware of the chatter in our old lives about 'this strange & unsettling weather' as i hurry, shivering to and from the washer and dryer, feeling like i'm missing out, but reminding myself that madison is not home right now... and maybe... anymore.

though as i write this i hear william talking to greg about "when we move back to wisconsin..." just as he spoke to me today. he knows this might not happen but he is a beacon of hope when it comes to this topic.

as it goes with leaving madison and moving to denmark, for william and i, we are your typical days in early spring. some are all about the warmth and invigoration of the days ahead. others, tributes to a passing season. most, somewhere in between.

voter registration

copenhagen living

we went to the u.s. embassy in copenhagen today to register to vote.

here is greg putting the burley up onto a bike rack at the train station in roskilde...

we could have registered from home, but let's face it... we still don't really know how to mail things internationally and figuring it out and actually doing it would probably take as much effort as a quick trip to copenhagen. and the embassy, along with the American Women's Club of Copenhagen and Democrats Abroad were hosting an actual voter registration event, so it seemed like a worthwhile endeavor.

here is what i imagined: the building itself would be old, grand, stately. after all, the danes have had a u.s. ambassador around since the early 1800's. there would be a large, open, gaudily carpeted entrance ("the grand hall") and over to the right somewhere would be a couple of folding tables with a sign saying, "voter registration event." the kids would run around on the carpeted floor and all of the many lounge chairs and couches while we filled in our registration information. and it would just so happen that the ambassador herself would be walking through at that moment and she would stop to say hi to henry and we'd leave saying 'wow, wasn't that cool? we saw the u.s. ambassador. so friendly! and we even got a picture of her and henry together.'

walking to the embassy

can you spot the clue in the distance that we're nearing it?

as it's coming into view, it's starting to look not so stately.

u.s. embassy, sans any kind of frills whatsoever:

and as i walked up to one of two front doors, i was quickly met by a security guard who asked me if i could please wait outside in the line. i didn't know there was a line. just a couple of guys standing around chatting, but alright, we will wait. later, this same person came out and checked our passports. then, when our turn came, he brought us through the door to the security area. we had to empty out our pockets, take off our belts, check anything electronic--there went henry's photo-op with the ambassador, and greg even had to take a drink of the water we'd brought along, which i thought was just airport folklore. after we cleared security, we went through locked doors to a glass window where we had to slide our passports to a u.s. military official, who kept them and in exchange gave us temporary visitor passes which we had to wear around our necks. then, we were taken through another locked door and finally to the room to register. needless to say, we never casually ran into the ambassador, but everyone else we came across was very friendly. and we did get registered and i learned that as citizens intending to return to the u.s. we can probably vote in local wisconsin elections! and that makes me so happy because we have a recall coming up!

the train on the way back was the nicest we'd been on. it's certainly not your "L" or even chicago metra. i don't even think amtrak compares to this...

william, loving the trains.

finally, from earlier today-- when you don't have a tub, you have to play with your bath toys in the sink sometimes...

freebird

we got a letter today from the pladsanvisning that one of the nurseries has a spot open for henry beginning april 1. unfortunately, we didn't get that same letter for william... yet. hopefully they will get him into the same place though. he needs school more than henry does, but i am excited for henry to start hearing more danish. and also a little sad. it feels like this is the end of his days at home (of course, as long as i don't have a job i will only keep him in part-time, so long as he remains a "little guy.") i have been lucky to be able to spend 13 months at home with him (save for the 3 months i worked over the summer) and it feels strange that, of the two of us, it will be him leaving home first. (i believe i was telling greg just yesterday as i was pulling out my hair in a moment of frustration: I NEED TO GET A JOB!)

but there you have it. i just hope he doesn't bite anyone.

grocery store trivial pursuits

both guys were up early to commemorate the beginning of a new week. in fact, william was up at 2 a.m. insisting he'd had enough sleep and wanting to go up and do a lego battle. it took him about 45 minutes of tossing and turning to return to slumberville. i was completely unaware of this until this morning as greg is on permanent overnight william duty (because i am on permanent overnight henry duty). sometimes greg's job is harder than mine, even though henry never sleeps through the night.

so we had a morning of playing while waiting for the super best (SB) to open (i figured sometime around 9:30 or 10, as is customary for these parts).

then we finally finished our weekend shopping trip. the first day we arrived in denmark and went to the SB, i forgot to weigh the pre-packaged grapes. i'd avoided this problem ever since that day, but today, it was slow enough in the store that i asked someone when i should expect to weigh items and when i could go forth into the world with produce of an unknown mass. so now i know that if the price is measured "per kg.," i need to use the scale and figure out what those kg's are. the problem is when i pick out a single shallot, but can't decipher the produce signs to figure out which one translates to shallot, to know if it's per piece or per kilogram. and i think... yes, they vary in size, so it's probably per kilogram, but am i honestly supposed to adhere a big sticker printout onto this little shallot? no.

well, i was wrong. and to my shame, i picked the same cashier who'd told me just three weeks prior, that i didn't weigh the grapes. only this time, when he said it to me in danish, holding up the shallot, i knew that i'd done wrong and that i should have known better. he left to weigh the shallot, which bought me some time in bagging up my other items. i'm very slow at this skill and often get lapped by two or three people behind me in line.

when he came back:

okay, so the sticker goes on the shallot. i will not make this mistake again.

later, more playing, lunch, nap, lego battle, outside, and then a walk down the long street to meet greg on his way home from work. he took the guys to the park while i turned off at home to start dinner. which is when i realized we were out of onions. let us chalk this entire next thought process up to long-term sleep deprivation and major life transitions. so i thought-- greg is already out-- how can i get a message to him to stop by the SB on the way home to pick up onions? well, he'd just emailed me his new ("smart") phone number and i thought-- maybe i can call him through skype (because his is the only phone between us right now). of course that didn't work. then i thought-- ah! it's a smart phone. i can email him a message and he will get it on his phone. so i did that. then i waited. and thought, he probably doesn't even have his phone on him. this is going to take a long time. i'm going to have to wait until he gets home and then maybe he can run over there... and that's when it finally hit me-- i have a bicycle. my current location is also very near to the SB. and i don't have two children in tow. i can just get my own shoes and coat on and go. it doesn't even have to be a 15 minute affair just to get to that point in the journey where we open the front door. i can go and be back in the time it would take me to double knot henry's shoes! and this would also be a good time to replenish the bag of mini chocolate chip cookies we bought in the morning as a special treat, and which william had been so excited about and which i had steadily and stealthily been working my way through since after lunch.

and it all worked! i couldn't believe how much easier it was getting to the grocery store when i a) have a bike and b) live close to it. i haven't lived so close to a grocery store-- maybe ever. and i dearly love my old neighborhood in madison and if we move back would love to move back there, but if we do, i think i will have to start up a little grocery store somehow... with all my business knowledge. and as an aside, i would like to say that we are starting to appreciate the super best, even as we continue to complain about it. we simply have not found anything much better (but we're still working on the farm veggie delivery.)

tonight's dinner: fish curry. it was delicious. go ahead and add a lot more spices than your recipe calls for and some extra tomato sauce. you won't be disappointed!

when imagining yourself in france...

a view from the harbor

so greg realized that today made 10 years since we'd gone on our first date. we imagined going to paris to celebrate, and i even thought i'd tell you that we did, but i'd have to fess up about three sentences into it, and besides, you'd know i was making it all up anyway.

no, what we did instead was a distinctly american activity. so american we had to come to denmark to do it:

we hung out at the mall.

the thinking that brought us to the mall was wanting to go somewhere in the direction of town. but given that it's sunday, we figured most places would be semi-deserted. but we'd driven past a shopping center the first day we were here and had a vague idea that maybe we'd pick up affordable rain boots there (our previous boots being one of many casualties in the couple of days before leaving town). we thought today would be a fine day to see what it had to offer.

we were incorrect in thinking the stores would be open. the consumer culture is so ingrained in us i guess. can you imagine if they closed stores on sundays in the u.s.? that would garner some attention.

but restaurants in the mall were open. bustling was a 'rustic cafe' and an irish pub. i saw danes eating leisurely meals in leather armchairs and i knew, somehow, our children would ruin their rustic and sophisticated dining experience, so we had our first meal out in denmark at "nachos." because we were the only ones in the restaurant (when we left, three other tables were filled), we chose their buffet, because it was large and already sitting there for a non-existent lunch rush. the paintings of saguaro cactuses and the fake saguaros placed throughout the restaurant, along with the restaurant's name, (but not the concurrent ancient greek motif running throughout the place or the italian wine on the tables) would have us believe it was mexican, but honestly, i'd say it had more of an indian flavor. though there were plenty of nacho chips to be had. despite the ambiguity, it was good food. the entire meal cost somewhere between $50-$60. (!)

henry sat still for about 1/3 of the dining experience and, as is the case in our own house, the high chair he was in did not include a way to strap him in place. so, he spent most of the time running toward the escalators. finally i walked with him in the opposite direction which seemed to have some activity emanating from it. open for business was a workout center, a movie theater (well, it was unclear if that was open or not) and... Capella Play.

i was pretty sure i regretted having found it. it was basically a costly indoor playground which william roped us into going into. but... in reality it was not so bad. william had a ton of fun, as did henry and it got out some of william's energy from the ice cream he'd roped us into getting him after lunch. and-- the adults got a free kaffe (coffee of course). and it was good coffee. i would never expect such good coffee from an indoor mall playground. the danes know how to outdo themselves sometimes.

after leaving we rode to the harbor. henry was asleep by this point, but william enjoyed walking around the docks and looking at boats and ducks.

it had started out a sunny day, but by this point it was cold and getting windier, so we got going. we pedaled along the fjord and onto the veddelev peninsula (pronounced something like villa-loo). but then william fell asleep. we were not ready for another night like last night, so we cut our tour short and headed back home. up vestre kirkevej (i am proud to say i was able to propel myself forward on my bike the entire ascent) and onto østre kirkevej.

to celebrate our imagined 10th-year-together trip to paris, we made crepes. okay, even this is not true. it's true that we made crepes but it is only because we did not have all of the ingredients on hand for our other planned meals for the week because the grocery stores we went to yesterday were ho-hum and the grocery stores today were closed. crepes were supposed to be this friday's dinner. but oh were they delicious. we happened upon a recipe in one of our cookbooks for rye flour crepes-- which worked! after making them we (i say we, but really it was greg) beat an egg, poured it in the pan and threw a crepe on top while the egg cooked. after the egg was cooked we filled it with pan fried potatoes, broccoli, cheese and greek yogurt. yum! and for dessert-- a thin layer of chocolate and (optional) peanut butter in the crepes.

okay, are you convinced? now go! make yourself some crepes!

but first... some cute photos from yesterday:

saturday

it was a cloudy and rainy day that stayed cloudy and rainy. consistent, which seems inconsistent with my idea about the weather here. it didn't stop us though from getting out. first, greg and the guys went on a 5k run, as they'd done last week. and this time with a stop at the bakery for some cinnamon bread (long gone by this point) and a pastry for william and i to share. the filling was the same as that first sugary treat i'd gotten along the pedestrian street in the center of roskilde. i still have no idea what it is. greg thought maybe marzipan. i don't know marzipan that well. it sounds like a good guess.

at some point this morning, greg went to remove the laundry that had been put in the dryer last night. it wasn't dry. later, i went to remove it. the dryer was stopped and the clothes still not dry. so, during henry's nap, i took the instruction manual, which is translated into about 4 languages, but not english, and typed much of it into google translate to get at least a rough idea about what we were doing wrong. (i was determined to end the madness!) the trouble seems to be that we may have turned the dial counterclockwise at some point. the manual very clearly, in bold letters, says NOT TO DO THAT. okay. lesson learned. i thought i would take my newfound knowledge and go down and try a timed dry on low heat, but of course, the dryer sat idly by, refusing to do anything when i tried. so for now, we are forced to dry on high heat, because the two automatic dryer settings (which do work) require high heat. that may also have been our mistake at times-- trying to dry on low heat using the automatic settings.

i took a picture of what we're dealing with:

trying to make the timed dry work. don't let that button in the top right corner fool you. it does nothing.

which is not nearly as complicated looking as the washing machine (in my opinion), and there is no manual for that:

would you like the star setting or the ball of yarn setting?

would you like the clock to run away from you or the line to go in the bucket?

but all of this pales in comparison to the laundry:

grumpy laundry.

in the afternoon, we took a burley-bike ride to trekroner, where all of the co-housing is, to visit a couple of ho-hum grocery stores. on the way back, both guys fell asleep. this always seems like a pleasant and unexpected break at the time, but of course we know we will pay for it later. by 8:30 i was wondering when the party would be over, and as i type this at 10:15, i can still here william whispering to greg as he's trying to fall asleep.

still paying for it.

balance

tonight-- my conscious attention directed at sweeping the floor, i am only peripherally aware of the silence surrounding me-- greg and the guys upstairs with the computer, no chattering streaming from the internet or from my children; the darkness outside the large kitchen window magnifying the light from within and so, magnifying my presence for any neighbor who may wander past-- and they do, frequently, because the stairs to the shared basement are right outside the window. and the subtle feeling of uncomfortableness this brings-- because i don't really know these neighbors, but i know their faces well enough by now and i know they never look in the window when i am standing at the sink, but i see them looking in when i am not. and they do not really know me, though they must know (and some of them do know) that we are not danish. we are not them. we are different. and their intense danish introversion, or whatever the proper description may be, sometimes feels like rejection, and frustration.

all this just an amorphous feeling. not a thought, as i clean up. the dustpan under the sink. the floor needs washing. and then, i realize. this is not really my life. it's suna's. the woman who lives here when we do not. i'm just sort of borrowing it. she is really the one who will clean up this floor and be neighbors with these neighbors while i... while i... what? while my life is to be determined. three years in denmark... what then? and what content will fill up these posts in that time? am i scared by this or am i excited for the adventure? do i relish in all of the unknown possibilities or do i just want to be settled? "settled" has always given me a claustrophobic feeling, but then, i've never felt so out of place until now, and with others besides myself to look after, and to make feel comfortable and well... settled. but i realize we are only three weeks in. that each day has managed to work itself out. that we are in a routine and know our roles when, say, henry wakes up in the middle of the night or william runs out of the bathroom to "surprise" one of us with his shiny, clean teeth and pajamas. or, when the floor needs sweeping and the guys need distracting. we do these things here and we'll do them at the next place and the next, and in that sense, we are settled. this is a comforting reality. one i can predict with fair certainty. the not knowing what comes next... all of those unknown possibilities... yes, i know for sure, these makes my eyes get wide and my heart skip with excitement! so where does my anxiety lie? in the places i feel i do net yet belong. in the grocery stores, the bank, on the street. i am hiding in plain sight. and when i am revealed. as a stranger. as an american. i sense mixed reviews: you don't speak the language-- good luck with that! you don't speak the language yet? why not???

but i will "give it time" and trudge forward. each day will work itself out and bring more of a sense of belonging, or at least knowing my place in this country, which, from a pessimistic point of view (but a view held by more than a few foreigners), could be the best i get. but that's a point of view i am not willing to embrace just yet. all of the possibilities of life in denmark have not yet revealed themselves, this being only the third week, as i mentioned. and i am really excited about two things in particular: 1) my children learning danish; 2) the work-life balance. also, the traveling possibilities. and the fact that henry will keep getting older (i am not under the impression that this is exclusive to his residing in denmark), though i am aware that he may very well become more of a safety hazard to himself before he becomes less.

so much to look forward to. plenty to be nervous about. a fine act to balance.